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britney spears

WiseChats

You’re Going Somewhere!

So, it’s 2016.

We have exactly 360 days left in this year. What goals have you set for yourself?

A map can show you where to go, but unless you get in the car and drive, your destination will always just be a dream. 

r-CROSSROADS-large570Think about it, when you make a decision to take a road trip with the girls you always have a plan of action and you are prepared to execute it. The weeks leading up to the trip you spend time calculating how much everything is going to cost, you develop an itinerary, and you decide what you will be wearing…duhhh. All this preparation allows you to enjoy the trip. And even if you run into bumps in the road during the trip, you’re able to roll with the punches and know what to do and not to do for next time.

The same mindset we take with trips is the same mindset that you must take with the goals you set and achieve for 2016. Lets face it, we are on a journey called life and we only get one chance at it. So remember that no matter how many obstacles you have faced and how many times you have been knocked down, its time to get back up. 

So lets cut to the chase! How do you set goals and achieve goals? Here are some tips I’ve picked up along the way that have helped me stay on track.

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1.) Decide what it is you want in life. Remember no one knows you better than you do. Don’t make the decision based on what sounds good, but instead what you are passionate about. Start dreaming again!

2.) Focus. No one can do too many things at once, it’s the same with setting goals. You have to prioritize. Start by thinking about the important areas of your life you want to achieve something in. For example I always break mine down into categories physical, financial, spiritual, and so forth. From there I brainstorm specific goals in each area I would like to achieve. You don’t want to get overwhelmed, so I suggest selecting only 3 goals for each category you choose. Remember You can always add on to your list. All your goals need to be SMART!
S – Specific (or Significant).
M – Measurable (or Meaningful).
A – Attainable (or Action-Oriented).
R – Relevant (or Rewarding).
T – Time-bound (or Trackable).

3.) WRITE IT DOWN. I can’t say it enough. Get your pen and paper and get to writing. This is important because you will definitely need to go back and look at it.

4.) “If you fail to plan you plan to fail.” Develop a plan of action. A genie in a bottle isn’t going to be granting any of your wishes anytime soon, so girl you got to work. You have to know where in the world you are going. Nothing happens overnight. You want to lose 50 pounds you need a plan. Are you going to get a gym membership? Or will you have a personal trainer? How many times will you workout each week? Are you cutting out sweets? Having a plan allows you to not wander aimlessly.

5.) Don’t let your goals collect dust. Find time to review them periodically. I remember every year I would set goals and make a plan, but when I would review it every month it made it real again. My eyes stayed on the prize. So every too weeks or even monthly pull it out and see where you are at in your progress.

6.) Accountability. Share your goals with a person you trust. I believe this will help in those times you get distracted or discouraged. Having someone there that has your best interest at heart and desires you to succeed is vital. They will serve to both encourage and challenge you to stay the course and finish the race.

These are only a few tips on how to set and achieve your goals. Throughout the process stay positive and remember failure is only final when you allow it to be. Become committed to making you the best you. If you take these steps, you cannot help but succeed. No matter what your dream is, you can achieve it.

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Post by: Rosanna M. Smith

Facebook: Rosanna Marie Smith

Instagram: gracefullyrose

 

Be sure to subscribe for email updates and follow House of Odara on Bloglovin for updates. Find me on Instagram, Snapchat (tinkrb11e) and subscribe to my youtube channel. All emails and inquiries can be sent to funmis1@gmail.com.

XoXo Emma

WiseChats

Toxic

Don’t You Know That It’s Toxic

So, how many of you remember that song Toxic by Britney Spears (yes, i’m old…lol). In it she sings about a boy that she knows is bad for her, but she is so addicted to him that she can’t let him go. I used to be obsessed with this song when I was younger. I sang it all the time because the beat was so catchy and the song was just fun. But, it’s actually a very sad song. Britney sings that the guy she’s in love with is dangerous but she loves it! Wait, what?! But, if you think about it, haven’t we all had a toxic relationship at least once in our life? #raiseshand

I used to be in a relationship like this. I dated a guy who was very mentally and verbally abusive. I was never good enough for him. I thought if I was slimmer, if I just wore more makeup, if I didn’t talk back and agreed to everything he said, he would be nicer to me. I dumbed down my voice and personality to try and be the person he wanted. But, what I didn’t realize was that he didn’t have the capacity to love me the way I needed to be loved. He had his own issues and problems. He was miserable, so all he had to give was misery. Now, if I decided to stay in that relationship, hoping and praying he would change, I would have no one to blame for my decision. So, I did the smart thing, I RAN! I left that relationship and never looked back. Believe me, it wasn’t easy to let go of someone I thought I loved so much, but I saw my future and I wanted better for it. I prayed and asked God for strength not to go back and not to give in. I occupied myself with other things, and a couple of months later I realized I hadn’t thought about him or about that situation in weeks.

Your situation might be different from mine. You might have been or are currently in a toxic friendship. You know, that friend that always puts you down, is secretly jealous of you and never has anything good to say about you. Or you might currently be in a toxic relationship where you are being abused physically or emotionally. Or your issue might be a boyfriend or girlfriend that only uses you for your money, your body or your attention. We’ve all invited these toxic people into our lives and allowed them to overstay their welcome. Sometimes we are so afraid of being alone, of letting go, of the unknown that we just live in the mess hoping for change. And sometimes we just stay hoping for the best. What we have to realize is that we have to be the change we want to see. If someone or something in your life is unhealthy, “do da Heisman on em” and keep it moving. Remember that you are worth more!

As we enter 2016, let’s make a decision together to let go of any relationships that are toxic. Whether platonic or romantic, if it doesn’t benefit us, our dreams and our goals, we will let it go. Let’s also decide to grab ahold of the things that matter to us, and be passionate about the good and healthy things in our lives. How many of you all will do this with me?

I want to know what toxic relationships and situations you have already let go of and which ones you plan on letting go of in 2016.  Share this post with someone that needs it and comment below and let us  your thoughts. Plus, I know I have some wise followers, so comment and let us know ways you cut toxic things out of our life. I can’t wait to read your responses.

 

*If you are in a physically toxic relationship, please find a pastor or counsellor to talk to. This is a serious situation and you have to speak to someone about it to get help and assistance in getting out. You are worth more than someone who cannot respect you enough to protect you from themselves* (334.613.3363)

Be sure to follow me on Bloglovin for updates and follow me on Instagram, Snapchat (tinkrb11e) and subscribe to my youtube channel. All emails and inquiries can be sent to funmis1@gmail.com.

XoXo Emma

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